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Writer's pictureStar Collective

People only love you when you're good. And that's not love

The human love that we like to call love has nothing to do with Love. People love that which is easy to love. People love their dogs, their cats, their family, their friends, whoever does them a favor, whoever smiles at them and makes their life beautiful. But that's not what love is. If one is prone to loving only some things and not the others, how is that love? You can call it preference, but you cannot call it love. Love encompasses all and doesn't discriminate. Love is not biased or conditioned upon, lessened, dampened or enhanced by how much or how little something or someone fits into a certain criteria that is supposed to make them worthy of our love.... But how can I love my enemy? How can I love the one that betrayed me, stabbed me, abandoned me? When you understand their role in your life. When you understand that without them hurting you, you would not be the one you are today, without the pain to shape you and how you see the world.

First, if you understand the Law of Oneness, you should also understand that the people you hate are a part of you. It is so much easier when you take as part of yourself the ones that don't do you any harm, isn't it? But if this was the only way one could love, then this would not be love because anything that is conditioned, maimed, truncated, tweaked, fine-tuned in order to be loved is not loved. One thing that Love is not and never will be is conditional. Any person that you have hard feelings for is mirroring back something about yourself that you do not see.


How can I love my rapist, the murderer, the criminal? For many of us, the mere thought makes our stomachs turn. People think that love means holding a positive focus on someone and disregarding the negative. No, I am saying true love is not dismissing the reality and the realness of the pain caused by the person, it is seeing the realness of your pain and the realness of the wrongdoing of that individual, not agreeing with it or making it ok AND at the same time love them. This sounds counterintuitive and lacking sense for a mind that is based in a materialistic, 3d based mindset (the ego), but on a deeper look, it actually makes sense. This type of inclusiveness mentality requires a higher consciousness of the individual, that is why not many peopleare able to hold this inclusive perspective. Loving someone does not automatically mean you have to agree with them, it does not mean you legitimize their actions or that it forces you to become blind to the bad deed. Just as, if you forgive them, it does not mean you validate, make ok what they did and let them off the hook. Forgiveness and unconditinonal love do not require you to drop the pain they have caused you or the resentment you feel for the evil that was done to you. You can admit to the hurt someone created in you and still love them from a distance.

There is not one enemy in your life that is not teaching you love. You have the right not to see it this way, you have the right to see yourself separate from the one that hurt you and you have the right to hate them. But it's not about you hating what is easy to hate. It's about learning to love that which is easy to hate. It's your choice.

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