Overreaction is just how people communicate their hurt

What happened to people becomes less important if they have processed what happened to them.

If you did not get to address your past pain, then you canot truly talk about an overreaction.

When we are not fully awoken to our truth and to who we are, we express our emotions exactly how we were taught in childhood that we should do it. For people with underexplored and underdeveloped capacity to feel emotions, self expression is the toughest and most challenging thing in the world. So they show emotions the way they know how. And on the exterior this might look either as too much or too little, depending on the types of wounds that they carry unconsciously. This is neither good or bad. It just is.

So telling someone they are overreacting when displaying certain behaviours it is perceived as invalidating because they are not consciously choosing to react the way they do. To them, it is their truth. The tool that they use to measure and assess the situation to which they have a reaction is none other than their own perception that may be (spoiler alert: always is, to a certain extent) skewed by an old unexplored and hidden pain. To them, the way they engage is the appropriate way and they rebuff any suggestion that it may be otherwise.

To the receiver at the other end the manner in which they choose to tackle a given situation may be puzzling. When you interact with someone and they act like this, tell them: `I see you are __________(fill in the blank with the feelings and emotions they strongly display). I would love for you to tell me more about how you feel so that I understand where you come from. If you decide not to, I completely understand. I am here for you no matter what. `

When you understand where this pain comes from, you will also understand the magnitude of the hurt. `Overreaction` evinces their wound. It is a cry for being seen by others. It is not drama and it is not a theatrical performance. It is real pain. We need to stop dismissing feelings and start respecting and accepting glaring display of emotions. We do not need to agree with them or think they are right in order to see them exactly as they are> unresolved trauma.