I truly believe that one of the strongest telltale sign of living out of alignment with our true self is SHAME.
When we feel shame in a certain scenario, I can guarantee there is a deep split going on between who you were told you should be (to gain approval & love) and who you actually are. This is applicable for anything in your life that you have disowned as unacceptable and bad because you were told to do so.
Because we can only feel the unbearable pain of shame about something that we know to be both true and unacceptable about ourselves that we are convinced we cannot admit to and own without huge consequences.
It's always the case with shame. Shame only happens in an atmosphere of deep internal fragmentation and repression of certain aspects within us. We are never ashamed of something that does not belong to some deep personal truth and what shame usually does is create personas/protective subpersonalities that overcompensate by being outspoken against the thing that is disowned. For example, you sometimes can see religious people who have disowned and denied their homosexual orientation because of the threat of banishment if they owned that truth about themselves. They would also be ridiculed and cast off by their family as well.
However much shame makes us act inauthentic (because it is trying to correct our perceived core flaws) at the same time, shame can teach us more about our true self than anything else.
In order to get to the bottom of what is true about you and labeled as intolerable, ask yourself the following questions and be willing to be extremely vulnerable and honest:
What is it about me in this moment that I feel is unacceptable?
What bad thing would happen if I allowed myself to own & admit to what is unacceptable about me?
Why is it unacceptable & who decides what is acceptable?
After you answered, consciously choose to either own/integrate your truth as is
or exalt it and then own/integrate it.
If you use your free will to reframe / exalt this about yourself, do it from a place of self love and compassion.
Never choose to change because you feel flawed and rotten at the core. Choose to change because you love yourself enough to commit to constant growth and evolution.
Comments