Part of my teachings, aside from finding and embodying your true self, is living a wholehearted life, which is the result of being your authentic self.
First, let's define what a wholehearted life is. My personal definition of a wholehearted life is a life where you are aware of and follow what is true and alive in you. And this aliveness is a pretty ambiguous term for most of us who are numbed out to our emotions, our body's language, our core values and our authentic self expression. And a wholehearted life encompasses all of these.
Living a wholehearted life can be challenging in today's fast-paced and ever-changing world. It can be easy to get caught up in the daily grind and forget about what truly matters.. In this blog, I will share tips to help you start living a wholehearted life. I challenge you to pick one tip and exhaust it by mastering it. This list of things to do to start living from the heart is by far incomplete. You are free to add whatever is right for you personally to these practices.
Commit to curiosity. When you start your journey back to your true self, the prerequisite for the success of it is that you commit to curiosity. What does that mean? Curiosity is inherently non-judgmental, it is simply an alert openness and eagerness to learn more. It means that you commit to receiving whatever comes up about your deeper sense of self with a desire to find out more. Curiosity pairs very well with compassion.
Let your personal truths come to light and get integrated. Whatever you're ashamed of, embarrassed, angry, sad, frustrated, disappointed with in yourself and others is what needs to be drawn closer to you to be examined with curiosity. Your true self is in all the things you truly like and truly dislike about yourself, in all that you suppressed or authentically expressed, in all the beautiful parts of you.
Your true self is beautiful not because it is perfect, but because it is true.
And when you consciously explore what is considered unacceptable about you, you will find that the initial intention of the unacceptable parts of you was to help you in the best way they knew how.
But this hidden beneficial intention was tainted by the meaning others (aka your primary caregivers) assigned to it via deflection or projection, hence making this intention wrong. In order to guarantee acceptance and belonging, you had to disown and separate yourself from the aspects of yourself bearing this intention.
And after you examine compassionately these parts of you and allow them to unfold how they initially intended, but were stunted - a process called exaltation of the disowned self - they will organically re-integrate into your consciousness, making up your true self.
Follow what feels right to you individually: Following what feels right to you individually is crucial in getting to know your own internal guidance system. Your intuition is unique to you and may not be the same as someone else's. It's important to listen to your own inner voice and trust the guidance it provides, even if it goes against the norm or what others may be doing. Remember, your intuition is there to guide you towards what is best for you, and you alone. So it is essential to be true to yourself.
Get to know your body and listen to its wisdom: Listening to your body's wisdom is an important aspect of getting to know and trusting your intuition. Your body stores a wealth of information and wisdom, and it is constantly communicating with you through physical sensations and feelings. Your body may send you signals through physical sensations such as a tight chest, butterflies in your stomach, or a sense of warmth or cold. These sensations can indicate that your intuition is trying to communicate something to you.
Live in the present moment: Another key to living a wholehearted life is to live in the present moment. I know that this one is a cliche, but its deeper meaning is far from what people actually understand by `living in the moment`.
Something that is less known is that when you don't know who you truly are, you also cannot live in the present moment.
Seems like a stretch. However, you must understand that your adaptive strategies and survival mechanisms (which are not you and belong to your ego/adaptive self) keep you locked in the mental stories about who you think you should be and hence away from the now.
One practice to comeback to the present moment (and hence to your true self) is to take notice of your surroundings, the sights, sounds, smells and sensations.
Connect with like-minded people: Humans are social animals and we thrive on connections with others. Building strong relationships with family, friends, and loved ones is an important part of living a wholehearted life. Make time for the people in your life, and be present when you're with them. Show them that you care and make an effort to understand their perspectives.
Find your aliveness: Living a wholehearted life also means following what makes you feel most alive. If you're not investing your energy into whatever brings the most of your personal truths to light, it can be hard to find fulfillment in your life. Take some time to explore what you're truly passionate about (career-wise or not) and find ways to incorporate that into your life.
Take care of yourself: Self-care is essential for living a wholehearted life. Taking care of your physical, emotional, and mental well-being is crucial for maintaining balance and happiness. Make sure you're getting enough sleep, eating well, and exercising regularly. Also take the time to do things that make you feel good, like reading a book, listening to music or spending time in nature.
Resource the unwanted aspects & experiences in your life to teach you more about yourself. A wholehearted life means we don't leave any part of our lives out. We use to our advantage everything that is happening within our reality. We resource what is called negative to serve us in getting clear about what we want instead. We allow things in our lives to teach us more in depth about ourselves.
The path of least resistance. A wholehearted life means we open our heart to receive life as it flows to us. We choose from the heart what is true for us and that is in our highest good. Choosing the path of least resistance in any life situation can only happen when we know how to differentiate between the urgency of the conditioning arising from the adaptive self and the intention of your true self which always feels flowing, spacious and liberating.
You know you are following your true self when you go with the path of least resistance.
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